...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
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