About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
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