I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
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