He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
