: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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