just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
its not stalking. its research.
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
