wat bout pragnant strippers??
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Randomize
