somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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