i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Randomize
