3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
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