Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
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