stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
We need to feng shui this bitch.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
