It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
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