Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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