It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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