you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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