Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Randomize
