why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Randomize
