He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
Randomize
