No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
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