She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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