i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Randomize
