it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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