I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
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