Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
