You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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