ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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