oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize