Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
I could have mohawked her pubes.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
Randomize