Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
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