I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
being pregnant is like rehab
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
