Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Randomize
