flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I am one with the molecules
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
