so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
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