Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I wish life had little blips of pornography
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
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