Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
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