So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
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