We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
