After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
