lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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