It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Randomize
