I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
