we have officially mastered the walk of shame
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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