So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
