If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
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