mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
birth control should be required to get into college
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize
