so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
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