Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize
