Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
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