What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
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