Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
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